Now I know why I have been so moody this week! My husband left this morning for a conference. My subconscious knew about it days before I actually realized he was going to leave and be gone for 5 days. I do much better when I am the one leaving, instead of the one being left.
Every time he says, "won't it be great when we can all go together". Meaning, won't it be great when we have enough cash to blow on airline tickets for 6 for a quick trip. Yeah, that will be great, but I have a feeling it might not even happen then. I mean our kids will have to go to school, we can't always be tagging along at conferences. And then he wouldn't be able to rent a convertible to drive around town in, he'd have to rent a mini-van. That somehow takes the fun out of a trip doesn't it?
I couldn't figure out these sudden symptoms: poor sleep and nutrition, headache, agitation for no apparent reason (well there was a reason, I just didn't remember it), and in general just a terrible last couple of days. It makes sense now. I hate it when he leaves. The last time was almost 6 months ago and I've gotten used to having him around. You know, around as much as a resident can be around.
Last night we said goodbye and he left this morning before we woke up. I don't handle him being gone very well. I can feel the stress all over my body. Thus my trip to the gym for some much needed YOGA! Oh, how I needed that. My muscles were tight and needed a good stretch. My mind was racing and I needed dim light and soft music. I needed Yoga. I love Yoga.
As much practice as I've had doing this alone I should be better equipped to do this. But this is the first time I've been left alone with 4 kids... could that be the difference? Whatever is going on I am sure I'll get over it. I do the same kind of thing around holidays. I get all.... "weird", it doesn't feel good. I wonder if there is an official diagnosis for a 30-something year old female who gets moody the few days before her husband leaves for trips and for the week preceding Christmas, Valentines Day, Anniversary and Birthday? I would say the symptoms are similar to PMS.... but since I am not menstruating (thank you breast-feeding), it can't really be PMS. What to call it????
The symptoms typically subside within a few days when I realize I am not going to die, but they are sure a pain to live with. My husband and kids would probably agree.
5 days. I can do this! I hope when he comes home the three bags of chocolate candy left-over from Halloween haven't been devoured and that I have changed out of these yoga pants.