Odyessy

A few months ago after failing to finding a home for our family to share during the last few months of residency we made a tragic mistake. You can read that post here.

The kind of mistake you know in the minute you make it that you will regret it.

The kind of mistake that is made because you feel hurt, rejected, humiliated, and hopeless.

The kind of mistake that could cost you a small fortune.

After leaving with our tails between our legs and combing the area only to come up empty handed, we went to the car dealership and drove a new van to soothe our pain. Notice I say we drove, didn't buy.

It was tempting to just say "the heck with it" and buy something large and beautiful and new. Sooooo tempting.

We used all sorts of justification/rationalization techniques.

• We deserve it (that is my favorite) 
• We have worked hard.
• We have already sacrificed so much.
• We need a bigger car we barely fit in our small van and we are driving cross country.
• Safety and Peace of Mind! "I am worried about you in our old car. I would feel better if you were driving something that we knew wouldn't break down and I could save people's lives without wondering if yours were in danger!"
• It is getting old, and will probably need to be replaced or repaired soon.
• We are going to have the money soon enough, let's enjoy some of it now.
• The terms right now are great!

But you know me, in the end none of these perfectly valid reasons worked on me. I am made of steel!

YES, I wanted one! But the thought of committing to a huge van payment (upwards of $600) when we didn't have a place to live, didn't know exactly how much money we were going to have, etc was enough to squelch that desire in it's tracks.

I still think about it. Once you have sat in a new leather trimmed, top of the line van every time you sit in your old, getting ready to fall apart van you think to yourself maybe the mistake was not buying it:-)

You especially think of it when driving down the freeway at top speeds the weather stripping on your windshield starts to come off and whips in the wind beating the sides of your van and at your next stop you have to tack it down with some silver duct tape. It reminds me of a joke: "You might be a redneck if...."

Yes, I am a redneck - but apparently I am also a doctors wife:-)