Head In The Sand

January is almost over! Usually at this point I have closed the books on the previous year and made a plan for the upcoming year. 24 days into the month of January I have done neither. Very uncharacteristic of me.

I used to think that I was a great multi-tasker. I was wrong. I can multitask items that are working together for the same end but I cannot work on several big items at the same time. Example: I hosted a book club meeting at my house yesterday. Preparing for that event took every ounce of my energy over 4 days. Actually, longer because I wanted to have my bathroom painted before then too.  I couldn't do anything else. Now that is over I can move onto other items on my to do list, like getting my budget ready for the year. I am pretending this nagging task doesn't exist, and it isn't working.

I don't want to look at last year. I don't want to think about this year. I want to keep my head in the sand. I keep peeking in on my checking account to make sure nothing strange is happening, and all is well, but I haven't been taking charge of my budget like I usually do. I will do it today, I promise.

One of the reasons I am not excited about working on it is that so much of our future planning depends on whether or not we can sell our house. I know you are getting tired of hearing my worries, I am sorry. We need to spend money to get it ready... which just reminded me of another reason why I don't want to work on our budget: we blew it this month with two trips to IKEA to get our house looking like a place someone would want to live in and buy. The foreclosed house next to us just sold. It might be good news if it hadn't sold for 40K less than it appraised for just 4 years ago. We've done the math and know what our "number" is that will allow us to walk away with empty hands. If we can't sell it for enough to pay off the mortgage, the realtor, taxes and closing taxes, what will we do then? Do we try to rent it and be out of state landlords? Do we borrow money to pay the difference so we can save our credit which we have protected so diligently? 

In all fairness, things have always worked out. Even as I look at the facts, that on all accounts point to the next few months being really bad for us financially, things have always worked out to be less of a problem than I anticipated. I am hoping and praying that the same is true for this situation.

And sometimes I have to just laugh at the irony that I am married to a doctor! Just for fun I have to laugh out loud, and I do frequently when things are getting sparse and our last few dollars are ready to be spent. I just think to myself "but, I am married to a doctor" and that makes everything better:-)